The 30 Best Horror Films Of All Time…of all time?

Monday is Movies. Sometimes TV. Today it's Horror. All Horror. Happy start to the working week...

The list is just a meme, shared this weekend because it was Friday the 13th, hence that film title is highlighted. But I looked through the list and realised quickly I had seen 29 of the 30. This, according to one million votes, was the list of the Best Horror Movies of All Time. And I had seen all of them apart from one.

Me being me, I was straight down the road to friendly Aro Video – use it or we’ll lose it – to rent the title that I had previously ignored.

Insidious was released in 2010 – which is probably why I didn’t see it. Some good horror films exist from that era, absolutely, but the “torture-porn” aesthetic was still heavily lurking, and the influence of the post-post Scream movies, the likes of Saw in particular, was not doing it for me. Besides, there are always things to get to – I only saw the original Wicker Man for the first time earlier this year. And that seemed to blow a few minds when I casually shared that across social media.

It was a big weekend for horror in our house – we finally caught up with Halloween Kills, at this stage the latest in a 40-year saga, and I’d seen every one apart from this. I liked it a lot actually. Good old-fashioned kill-fest. It reminded me of the original sequel in the franchise, but better.

We also – finally – went to Fear Factory. This horror maze in Cuba Street has been on Oscar’s mind for a couple of years now. He’s 10 and loves horror films – you can read his horror recaps over at his site Fascinating Inspires (he’s seen over 70 horror films and still can’t understand why he wasn’t allowed in to see the new Batman with me. Neither can I,  but rules are rules I guess…)

Anyway, the lure of a Friday the 13th theme finally got us over the line. Oscar was keen. He’s had a great couple of weeks back at school, a new routine with more after-school chores and responsibilities, so it was time for a little reward.

I think the scariest it ever got was on the threshold, standing there waiting to go in. Oscar was wondering if he’d made the right call as the tension was building, his nervousness rising with the anticipation. He said to me afterwards, “Dad, horror is always on the other side of the door, isn’t it?” And I thought, if that hasn’t been used as a tagline already, it could be.

So, Fear Factory was fun – we laughed, he nearly got lost (it was very hard to see at various points) we didn’t scream “chickens” or “nightmares” (the things you yell if you need to ‘tap out’) and we had an exhilarating stroll home after, with Oscar absolutely buzzing at the new experience. I had tried my best to play up being a bit more scared than I was. Not only am I probably detached and desensitised from 30 odd years of filling my mind with horror, but the real scare would have arrived if one of the ghost-actors had not only screamed behind me, but also whispered that “an email is about to come through wondering if you have capacity to pick up some workflow from a colleague”.  I mean, that’s the real horror these days, right?

I wrote this about Fear Factory. But if you’ve ever been curious to go, I’d thoroughly recommend it.

I finished reading the excellent ghost story, Nothing But Blackened Teeth, started a book of Stephen King short stories and barely fielded the question from Katy about why am I so horror-obsessed by answering, ‘why wouldn’t you be?’

Oh, and I watched Alligator II: The Mutation. Something I definitely didn’t need to see. Then again, the original Alligator is arguably the film that set me off; frightened me no end as a kid, even though it’s comically bad. So, of course in my line, in my life, that means I absolutely did have to see the sequel. Not disappointed that I finally did.

And that’s why I had to see Insidious. It was presented to me. One film on a list I hadn’t seen – better finish the list.

Look, it’s pretty good. Basically, a recasting of Poltergeist, and the haunted house riff starts to play before the script is flipped and we see it’s not the house that is haunted, it’s the people. The film falls away and can’t quite stick the landing, but this is basically my complaint of every horror film released in the last 20 years, excluding the work of Ari Aster and Robert Eggers.

Insidious was written by James Wan – and, depending on where you stand, he is one of the saviours of horror, or he’s cheapened and ruined it. But his success is undeniable. He created The Conjuring, co-created Insidious (which is a franchise now, because everything has to be a franchise) and what got him on the board was co-creating that nasty, but hugely influential series, Saw.

I saw Saw (lol) when it was released. And liked it. Clever little film. But the sequels feel like queasy, diminishing returns (which, er, hasn’t stopped me ticking them all off the list).

One his way to making the multiverse of The Conjuring, Wan stopped off to create Insidious, which he did because he wanted to be taken more seriously than just the guy that grossed everyone out with the Saw films. He wanted to show he could create a compelling supernatural horror. Pretty good move all up. Seems to have worked out pretty well for him. (Oh, I even have a poem about the Saw films, lol).

Anyway, I’ve completed that list.

It's a pretty good starter-kit for horror I reckon. We could debate the running order for days, you might lament certain key sequels not being there, but I feel like they are included, since horror is all about gateways, and the key franchise players – Jason, Michael, Freddy – are all represented by their first films (Friday The 13th, Halloween, A Nightmare on Elm Street) so by association you can add, or get to, any or all of the other films from those series’.

Evil Dead II is probably a better call than Evil Dead, but again, I feel like it’s acknowledged just because the original is mentioned; to break that rule I like that Alien and Aliens are both mentioned, as connected as they are they are vastly different experiences. Someone might tell you they’re not even horror, but I like them as sci-fi-horrors, and love that they’re included here.

Maybe there’s a few too many here that aren’t pure horror – and is there one too many Stephen King titles? (I kinda can’t believe I said that, at the same time I would gladly lose Pet Sematary). No early Peter Jackson here, because it’s not a Kiwi list. So if you wanted Brain Dead or Bad Taste, you are out of luck.

The big shock to me – in a list that includes The Sixth Sense and The Silence of the Lambs, which I’d struggle to ever see as pure horror – is where the hell is Child’s Play. (And I’ll just quickly add, what the fuck is The Amityville Horror doing here on a list this tight, might as well just slap Children of the Corn in too, mind you if we start mocking films for the redundancy of their sequel legacy then suddenly Hellraiser, a mighty fine film, is in line for questioning).

We watched the original Child’s Play again just recently. It stands up so well. It’s funny, it’s creepy, it is tightly constructed. It’s a pretty good franchise all up too. I’ve recently bought the scores to the first two films on vinyl, love them. And in fact I love Childs’s Play 2 so much I’m thinking of reconsidering my belief that Friday The 13th Part Two is the best horror sequel.

All of this rambling horror chat is really just to ask you what you think of this list. What you would add or subtract, and how many of the films you’ve seen or plan to see?

Also, what did you think of Insidious?

Finally, as a budding film score buff, I loved the soundtrack for Insidious. One of its very best aspects. Lots of great jump-scare cues and brilliant tension – and eventual release.